Inspiration for the Song
Degeneration explores the way modern consumer culture manufactures emotional imbalance and sells identity back to us in pieces. The core concept for this song/painting came from a long conversation with my teenage daughter about the effect of marketing and social media on self-esteem for teenage girls. I was reminded of how I felt at her age, and felt compelled to speak out.
Unfortunately we live in a world that profits from convincing us that we are incomplete.
Every insecurity becomes a market.
Every fear becomes content.
Every flaw becomes a product opportunity.
“Degeneration” is what happens when we forget our wholeness, when an entire generation is taught to see itself as broken.
Consumerism teaches us to measure ourselves through material value. In the world of supply and demand, the “suits” manufacture the “demand” that we are never good enough. They break our collective spirit, and in turn, they “supply” us with a whole target-marketed magical world of shiny objects to “fix” ourselves. By participating in this toxic ecosystem, we agree to perpetuate “The Industry” that “profits from our mass self-destruction”.
Lyrics to “Degeneration”:
“Pull on my dress, (impress)
I wanna run away
But it's the price I pay when everything is for sale.
Discount the times I click,
Don’t want a bit of it,
I want all of it
Packaged up and perfect”
This antsy feeling that we want everything and nothing at the same time is not indecision, it’s a frantic state where we are pulled in multiple directions at once. It is a result of our attention span being worn down by constant interruption and ads 24/7.
The next part speaks directly to the “suits”:
“What you spend on me gives dividends
You got your deficit so be sure to fix me
Make me better, you say I’m never enough
So make me better.
Make me.
Make me.”
The words “make me” are repeated because the first time I am asking, “Hey Industry!!! Can you make me better, because you said that you can. Let’s do this! I buy into this self-improvement thing! Yeah man, let’s go!” and then the second time I repeat it, it flips to rebellion, shouting “Hey Industry!!! Try and make me conform to your status quo, I dare you!”
The words “make me” are an immature way of confronting someone, like in a tantrum. I use the phrase to make the voice come from a young person speaking truth to power and rebelling against a shallow and materialistic society. This is from an innocent state. We are not meant to lead superficial lives of disconnect and ego pampering. We are meant to thrive on meaningful connection with others and deep and peaceful satisfaction within ourselves. That is our true baseline that has been replaced by chronic stress, anxiety, pressure, and depression….the costs of doing business.
In this next section the inner resistance flares up and thinks NO! I don’t want to be part of this myth machine!
“So, you want a war of emotion.
You want to profit
from our mass self-destruction.
No! What have you put in motion?
You have created
your own degeneration.
Feet to the fire,
poison in our palms
defeating these monsters
you conjured without our consent,
just to create your content.”
“You conjured without our consent” is the moment where it is debatable whether we have the willpower to overcome society’s negative influence. It is an open ended question. The last part of the song goes back to the frantic conflicted mind, split between being fine and being “the enemy” to oneself.
Myths become monsters when we believe in them.
As an example, we may feel perfectly fine about the way our cheek next to our eye looks but when we find out what “crows feet” are, suddenly we look at that spot to see if there are any “crows feet” on our face, and if there are, what should we do about it!?!
The life cycle of the myth is that
#1 The suit creates the myth.
#2 The myth latches onto our psyche and becomes the monster.
#3 The consumer eats the myth and there is a need for another, so
#4 Repeat
“Keep up the buzz, filter what I can’t unsee.
Take my body.
Prop it up, and then crop it down.
Star-studded mirror, cold.
I don’t know what I see.
I am the enemy
according to your script.
Special disorder
come get it while it lasts.
It is going fast,
for a limited time only.
Make me better.
You say I’m never enough
so make me better.
Make me.
Make me.
So, you want a war of emotion.
You want to profit
from our mass self-destruction.
No! What have you put in motion?
You have created
your own degeneration.”
The suits can’t offer anything to fix you if you don’t consider yourself broken.
Are we able to see a way to “opt out” of the myths? Rebelling begins the moment we stop asking to be fixed. Is it simply a matter of changing our mindset? I don’t know the answer yet, but I wanted to make something worth screaming together while we figure it out.
Inspiration for the Painting
Burning the Myth
Thoughts about the painting: Myths can either be accepted/consumed or rejected/burned up. This painting is meant to express that inferno. The saturation of color combined with contrast and movement helped express urgency and passion. The dotted lines are scars reminiscent of plastic surgery, or what should be corrected, and there are a few graffiti-like words hidden in the painting because as we know these “myths” take hold to our psyche much more easily if they are difficult to detect.
The hottest fires burn blue-violet at their core, so I avoided earthy neutrals entirely. No cadmium reds, no greens, definitely no beige. Only bubblegum pinks, bright whites, magenta, phthalo turquoise, and alizarin crimson.
I really saw the color combinations first before I had a grasp on the composition. The motion of clouds and fireflames moving around in a space that had etchings underneath was symbolic of unrealistic beauty expectations. We can either accept the guidelines (the linework below) or disregard it and instead choose how to streak through creating something beautiful in its own way.
I wanted to make something that was beautiful to look at and would have a sensory appeal where you’d want to be “with” the art piece. I had early concepts of doing something grotesque to reflect horrifying beauty standards or something more off-putting as a means to express a statement, but it seemed more poignant to be on the other side of rebellion/repulsion and have something that had elements of destruction in it turned into something we’d want to have in this world.
There’s already enough in this world we don’t want to see.
-lovelovelovemaery