I started this painting on a day I felt particularly rejected as a mother. For as high as my pride and love goes up, it can also come down and make me feel defeated, and really at odds with my little people. The steadfastness of motherly love never changes, but the everyday dance of expectation, joy, pride, connection, and basic “am I doing this right?” sensation is there.
I chose to include a wide spectrum of color undulating from cool to warm so as to cover all of the possibilities in life. I also had a wide range of hues for the same reason. The whole idea of this illustrating a person’s source of intent made it feel even more important to not leave any hue out of the mix, and also to honor that sometimes life can be golden and uplifting and full of good times and sometimes we can get caught in the shadows, or we could encounter struggles.
Usually we feel like logic is at the center of our understanding. We strive and hide, pull away and lurch forward. Logic is there as an undeniable magnet. A dotted line to follow. A backbone to all our mushiness. Sometimes the distortion is so loud, that we lose sight of the dotted line, and the super fast blurry glitch makes us see something else.
“No Such Thing As Silence” “Can you hear my voice? A tap at a window. A drop of a pebble. A circle of cadence all wound up together. Up and down My voice shifts with The mood that suits. Sometimes I can see my reflection in ripples around me. There is no such thing as silence.” As a child I used to try to be invisible. I would hide so still, trying so hard not to make any noise at all. Then I would hear my stomach gurgle, or my breath scrape the silence. My clothes would shift, or I would hear my eye lashes clink together if I blinked. I wanted to know what the...
This painting is a top view of the tension before an eruption. It is an emotional illustration of what it feels like to smooth over and contain volatile information. You can see the tension lines that are threaded together. This is the willpower or strong will to contain what is underneath the dark parts.